We know the boatload of emotional drama all you 20-something single and eligible-for-marriage girls go through on listening to that pesky dialogue. But girls, instead of getting frustrated over those shitty lines (as always), let’s do something better today. Let’s laugh over all the things only we single souls can relate to!!
So, here’s a list of all the deep shit dialogues only we eligible, but not ready to *get married* girls are simply TIRED (and annoyed and irritated and mad and……) of hearing:
“Beta Rishta Aaya hai”
THEN WHAT? Should I Throw A Celebration Or Go Straight To The Temple To Express My Gratitude To God For Sending Me A *RISHTA*!!
“So When Do You Plan To Get Married?”
Aunty ji/Uncle ji, first of all, if I may ask you- what in the world do you have to do with my marriage?? I will get married when I want to or when I find the right guy or maybe NEVER! But how will that affect your fucking life?!
“You Do Want To Get Married Eventually, Right?”
No, I want to become a celibate priest and live in the mountains for doing ‘tapasya’ all my life and THAT’S THE REAL PLAN!
“Your Body Clock Is Ticking!”
Thanks, for making me remember my mortality so casually, you’re awesome! *Tick Tock Goes The Death Clock*
Yeah, you’re right, my body clock has started ticking and it’s trying to remind me that I should kill you before I DIE!!
“OMG, How Come You’re Not Married Yet? You’re So Amazing!”
Haven’t had the time actually because of my busy schedule. Yeah, I stay extremely busy fending off idiots like you!!
“How Do You Feel About Hitting 30 Soon?”
Oh, I didn’t know being in your twenties meant you’re going to hit 30 sometime really-soon in the foreseeable future! Thanks for the valuable information. I’m indebted to you for life.
“When I Was Your Age I Was Married And A Mother Of Two!”
Wow, I must salute you for that! What an achievement ma’am, where’s your Oscar?
Have You Put On Some Weight?
Did you really ASK that? TAKE. IT. BACK. NOW!!
“You Know Sometimes The Right Person Knocks-In When You Least Expect It, You’ll Be Surprised By How That Happens!”
I’m more surprised with your sense of non-sense! And you know I don’t like surprises, specially not the bad ones you see.
“Aren’t You Worried You Won’t Be Able To Have Kids If You Wait For Too Long?”
“Extremely worried. After all, I’m twenty-fucking-three and having kids is the utmost priority of my life, it’s much MORE important than my career, my life, my passions and my own self!” That’s what you wanted to listen, right? But NO Bitch NOO!!
“Career? Girls Aren’t Meant To Have Careers. It’s Just A Way Of Distracting Yourself Till You Get Married And After That It’s Only Your Family And Your Kids For You!”
Oh, I didn’t know that. Thank you for guiding me about my life choices, much thanks!
“How Does It Feel To See Your Friends Getting Married While You’re Still Single?”
IT DOESN’T REALLY MATTER!
BTW how does it feel getting smacked right on to your freaking face? Tell me?
“You Need To Learn How To Cook To Survive In Your Sasural?”
Oh really? I’m glad I know this now, all because of you!
“Joined A Gym? Good Beta, Now You’ll Start Getting Some Good Marriage Proposals!”
I can’t believe you just said that. The purpose of my entire existence feels sorted. Really.
“Have You Made Your Profile And Given Your Data On Matrimonial Sites And Marriage Dot Coms?”
Yeah, and you know which one is my favourite?
*SHUT-THE-FUCK-UP-AND-MIND-YOUR-OWN-FUCKING-BUSINESS Dot Com!*
“I Can’t Wait To Dance At Your Wedding!”
For God’s sake, DON’T. Please don’t. I would want my wedding to last longer than one dance performance.
“Beti You’re Next!”
NAHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! God please save me!!
“When I Was Your Age, I Used To….( Add Some Unreal Societal Expectation!)”
I’m not YOU and i would NEVER want to be, it will be good as soon as you understand this!
“Why Are You Doing This With Your Life?”
Yeah, i really like to screw my life, infact i completely love doing that, any problem!?
“So Seriously, When Do You Plan To Get Married?”
NOOOOOOO, NOT AGAINNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! PLEASE SPARE ME!!
To All the Uncle Jis, Aunty Jis and relatives who love to bug us regarding our marriage plans- ‘SORRY, BUT WE AREN’T SORRY!’
To have a glance at some real & fun wedding moments for inspiration, ideas, trends and more, CLICK HERE!